What Excites Us!

Conflict Happens - The Polyamory Paradox with Irene Morning

If you’ve ever wondered why opening your relationship feels exciting and like your nervous system is staging a coup… this episode is your new best friend. 
In this conversation, I sit down with somatic coach, pleasure witch, and bestselling author Irene Morning, whose book The Polyamory Paradox finally names the body-based realities of non-monogamy that most people tiptoe around.
We talk about: • how your body reacts to big relationship transitions• why “thinking it through” only gets you so far• jealousy, conflict, and co-triggering… and what to do when it all goes sideways• the difference between what someone says and what you hear• listening to your body when you’ve spent years overriding it• micro-practices for regulation, repair, and pleasure• permission to be poly, permission to be monogamous… permission to be YOU
Irene brings humor, nuance, lived experience, and the kind of grounded wisdom that makes everything feel less overwhelming and more possible. Whether you’re polyamorous, poly-curious, monogamous, or still deciding… this episode gives you real tools for real relationships, rooted in body awareness and compassion.

Exploring Psilocybin’s Healing Potential with Amory Jane

What if the same medicine that helps you face your shadows could also melt sexual shame and reconnect you to pleasure?
This week I sit down with Amory Jane—sex educator, mom, and one of Oregon’s first licensed psilocybin facilitators—to talk about the very real places where psychedelics and sexuality meet. We get into the messy, beautiful stuff: what “set and setting” actually look like in the real world, how a facilitated journey unfolds start-to-finish, and why integration (not the trip) is where so much healing lands.
Amory shares how Measure 109 opened the door in Oregon, what a skilled facilitator does (and never does), and the ways psilocybin can support folks navigating anxiety, depression, PTSD, and PMDD. We also dig into releasing sexual shame, learning to trust your body again, and building relationships with more honesty and consent. Plus, yes—her delightfully nerdy side project: handcrafted, sex-positive furniture.
If you’re curious about legal psychedelic work, trauma-aware sex education, or you just want a compassionate, grounded conversation about healing and pleasure—this one’s for you.
Find Amory Jane:
Website: https://www.amoryjane.com/
Psilocybin services (Fractal Soul / Triumphant Unfolding): https://www.triumphantunfolding.com/
Sex-positive furniture: Amory.Design

OCD, Anxiety & Intimacy: Why We Don't Talk About It (But We Should) - An Encore Episode

What if the thoughts you were most ashamed of weren’t actually you—but symptoms of OCD?  And what if those thoughts were silently sabotaging your intimacy, relationships, and sense of self?
 
Most people think OCD is only about handwashing and perfectionism—but what happens when it shows up in your sex life, your relationships, or the thoughts you’re terrified to say out loud?
In this episode, I’m joined by licensed clinical social worker Sarah Hazleton to explore the lesser-known faces of OCD, including relationship OCD, sexual intrusive thoughts, and “Pure O.” We talk about how OCD hijacks intimacy, triggers shame, and convinces people they are their thoughts—when they’re not.
Sarah explains what OCD actually is, why intrusive thoughts are so common (and so misunderstood), and the gold-standard treatment that works: Exposure and Response Prevention (ERP). We also discuss how to find the right therapist, red flags to watch for, and why traditional talk therapy can actually make OCD worse.
If you or someone you love has ever thought:❌ “What if I secretly don’t love my partner?”❌ “What if I’m attracted to the ‘wrong’ person?”❌ “What if my thoughts mean something is deeply wrong with me?”
—this episode is the one you’ve been waiting for.
🧠 Article referenced: https://www.verywellmind.com/impact-of-ocd-on-sex-life-5086811🌿 Connect with Sarah: https://www.hazeltoncounseling.com
Released in honor of Mental Health Awareness Month. Because intrusive thoughts don’t make you broken—they make you human. And help is possible.

Aging and the Power of Pleasure with CJ

Aging isn’t the end of desire—it can be the gateway to your erotic evolution. 💥
In this conversation, CJ of No Shame with CJ shares how she went from quiet and compliant to boldly pursuing pleasure, non-monogamy, and kink—and why midlife is the perfect time to rewrite the rules. We get into hormone shifts, self-advocacy with doctors, queering jealousy, and building a pleasure practice that supports brain health and longevity. If you’ve ever wondered, “Is it too late for me?” this one’s your permission slip.
Connect with CJ and grab her freebies:Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/noshamewithcjWebsite: https://www.noshamewithcj.com/

Asexuality & Aromanticism: Beyond the Myths with Aubri Lancaster

What if “not feeling it” isn’t a problem to fix—but a valid orientation?
This week, AASECT- and Ante Up!–certified sexuality educator Aubri Lancaster joins me to unpack the rich, nuanced worlds of asexuality and aromanticism—far beyond the usual myth-busting. Aubri shares her path from hosting adult toy parties to discovering her own asexual and gray-romantic identities, and how language finally gave shape to experiences she’d had all along.
We explore the difference between sexual, romantic, sensual, aesthetic, emotional, and intellectual attraction; why micro-labels can be liberating, not limiting; and how self-identification helps people set needs, boundaries, and find community. We also touch on insights from the Asexual Community Survey, the fluidity of orientation over a lifetime, and the social pressure to make ace experiences “palatable.”
If you’ve ever wondered where you fit on the spectrum—or how to better love the people in your life who don’t center sex or romance—this conversation offers clarity, compassion, and a bigger, kinder vocabulary for being human.

Tied to Something Real: Shibari, Scent & the Sacred Art of Connection with Francis Bollwage

What if rope and aroma could quiet the noise of modern life and plug you back into real, felt connection—body, heart, and spirit?
Gwyn sits down with Francis Bollwage—rope artist, facilitator, and self-described “label-resistant” human—whose near-death experience rewired his path from addiction and numbness to a mission of deep human connection. Francis shares how discovering the BDSM community (and especially Shibari/Japanese rope bondage) helped him work through touch aversion, build trust, and create spacious, non-sexual intimacy. He breaks down the therapeutic and spiritual sides of rope, why he pairs it with aromatherapy/essential oils (hello, scent–memory pathways), and how guided imagery and “rope space” can feel like a shamanic journey. You’ll also hear how his Embrace Love workshops use simple, clothing-on ties, breath, and scent to help partners (or new friends) communicate, co-regulate, and remember what presence actually feels like.
You’ll hear about:
From near-death to mission: choosing connection over disconnection
Rope as meditation: safety, consent, and creating “rope space”
Aroma & memory: why certain oils can shift state and anchor experiences
Connection beyond sex: spirituality, sensuality, and community care
Entry-level practices you can learn without prior kink experience
If you’re craving less doom-scrolling and more embodied “I’m right here with you,” this episode offers grounded ways back.

From Monogamy to Polyamory to Celibacy - A Journey with Jay House

What happens when you stop defaulting to “the script” and follow your real desires—even if they lead you from monogamy to ENM… and then to celibacy?
Writer and desire-explorer Jay House joins Gwyn for a candid, nuanced journey through identity, intimacy, and integrity. Jay traces her path from straight, monogamous marriage to embracing polyamory, ethical non-monogamy, and kink—and why she’s now in a six-month celibacy container to cultivate emotional and nervous-system sobriety. Together they unpack non-romantic but deeply intimate spiritual partnerships, how clear boundaries can make kink non-sexual, and why integration (not more courses) is the missing step in real growth.
You’ll hear about:
Getting honest about desire and letting labels evolve over time
Redefining connection: intimate spiritual partnerships beyond “friends” or “lovers”
Jay’s celibacy experiment: rules, edge cases, and staying accountable
Integration > accumulation: applying BDSM, shamanic kink, and tantra learnings to real life
Knowing your parts (hello, Cranky Baby) for clearer communication and healthier relationships
Connect with Jay:
Substack: https://futuristphilospher.substack.com/
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/jaylamarhouse
Resources mentioned:
Mama Gena: https://mamagenas.com/
Kasia Urbaniak: https://www.kasiaurbaniak.com/
Shamanic Kink: https://www.shamanickink.com/
Barbara Carrellas’ Urban Tantra Professionals Training: https://barbaracarrellas.com/
Om Rupani: https://www.omrupani.com/
The Five Personality Types (Stephen Kessler): https://the5personalitypatterns.com/
If you’re rethinking relationship defaults—and craving more sovereignty, clarity, and joy—this episode is a loving nudge to design intimacy on your terms.

Reclaim the Lifegasm you Deserve with Dr. Fanny Leboulanger

Tired of being told to “be your best self” when you’re barely keeping it together? This one’s your permission slip to stop fixing and start living.
Dr. Fannie Leboulanger—family physician, coach, yoga teacher, and host of Your Sexyfied Life—joins Gwyn for a bracing, compassionate convo about stepping out of survival mode and back into your body. Together they bust the “always improve” myth, unpack why being with your messy emotions is wildly courageous, and make the case that sexual energy is life-force energy—your creative spark, not a shame button.
You’ll hear about:
Joy recovery and the real first steps between self-awareness and self-love
Why individualized wellness beats trends and quick fixes
The “non-consensual S/M dungeon of the mind” (and playful ways to defang inner bullies)
How to meet sensations (not stories) so feelings move through in seconds, not days
Reclaiming sexual energy to feel more alive, creative, and connected
If you’ve been chasing “better” and craving relief, this episode is your gentle reset: less hustle, more wholeness—right now.
Connect:
Dr. Fannie: fannyleboulanger.com • Podcast: Your Sexyfied Life
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Your Body’s Yes - From Triggered to Tender: Attachment Styles, Self Consent, & Intimacy with Shelby Avann

What if your body has been telling you the truth about your relationships all along? In this episode, intimacy coach and healer Shelby Avann joins Gwyn to explore how attachment styles, self-consent, and the chakra/energy system shape our love lives and our sex lives—often right down to the physical sensations we feel (hello, crygasms 👋).
Together we cover:
The four attachment styles—how they form and how to move toward secure
Self-consent: slowing down, listening to your body’s yes/no, and rebuilding trust with yourself
How emotional blockages can show up as physical pain (and what to do about it)
Somatic tools you can use today: breathwork, grounding, sensory check-ins, and boundary practice
Reiki and energy work as gentle support for intimacy healing
The Erotic Blueprints (Jaiya) and why mismatched “erotic languages” create friction
Community, kink/tantra curiosities, and creating safer containers for pleasure
Guest: Shelby Avann — intimacy coach, energy healer, and creator of the Intimacy Incubator programs.Find Shelby: shelbyavann.ca • Instagram: @theintimacymistress
Join the conversation: Search “What Excites Us” on Facebook and share your takeaway, or leave a voice note at whatexcitesus.com (SpeakPipe button).If you love the show, support bonus content on Patreon—and remember: you are loved, because I love you. 💗

Own Your Yes: Kink, Consent & Everyday Power

After a wild six months (surgery, moving, kids—life!), Gwyn is back—and flipping the mic. In this conversation from Amy Rowan’s Unlocking Intimacy summit, we get real about how exploring kink can grow self-trust, sharpen communication, and translate into everyday confidence far beyond the bedroom.
Gwyn and Amy unpack the fundamentals that make any sexy connection better: talking outside the bedroom, setting flexible boundaries, using yes/no/maybe lists, and building in check-ins, safe words, and aftercare. You’ll hear practical ideas for starting light and slow, playing with sensation (thuddy vs. stingy), planning scenes that build delicious anticipation (hello, color-coded signals), and why the “bottom” holds real power. Plus: where to find beginner-friendly resources and why porn is entertainment—not education.
If you’re kink-curious or ready to deepen what you already love, this one’s both grounding and permission-giving. Grab the free 10-page starter guide to dipping a toe into kink (earthlydesire.com/k1nkgu1d3), and come join the conversation in the What Excites Us community.